From rejection to acceptance
Those who are accepted by God never have to prove themselves.
Uncomfortable feeling
It’s quite something. Yesterday, I shared a story about a world-famous Hollywood star who, according to the sources I read, struggled considerably with feelings of inferiority. I wrote the piece in the firm belief that it was based on facts. But as the evening progressed, something started to gnaw at me. An uncomfortable feeling that made me decide to double-check everything.
The story sounded so convincing and, to be fair, was very well written by the original source. But after fact-checking the actor and his wife, the cat was out of the bag: pure fake news. Just made up. That’s a real bummer, because ultimately I want to write an honest story that readers can trust. So I didn’t hesitate for a moment and immediately removed the article from my website and social media.
The reality
Still, the theme stayed with me. Because although this specific example turned out to be incorrect, the underlying issue is more relevant than ever. I delved deeper into the subject and this time I did check the sources thoroughly. The reality is that a great many people struggle with insecurity, rejection, and feelings of inferiority. And they are certainly not the least important people.
Without naming names: there is a TV presenter who, since her debut, has been open about her insecurity about her weight and appearance. Or take that well-known Dutch actor who says that his insecurity has only increased in recent years. A well-known comedian also pointed to his insecurities as the underlying cause of his addiction problems. And even a top athlete, a soccer player who had won everything, admitted that the stress and insecurity plunged him into depression after his career.
So yes, my first example from my previous contribution was completely off the mark, but that doesn’t make the subject itself any less true. It’s something we all have to deal with sooner or later, whether we notice it in ourselves or in the people around us. To be honest, I don’t think anyone can really escape it completely.
Self-acceptance
So you see: all the examples I mention have exactly the same challenge. The key to breaking that cycle of rejection is learning to look at yourself differently. Self-acceptance is not a luxury; it is the foundation. In your life, it is essential that you accept yourself for who you are, not for what you achieve.
This requires a radical change in our thinking. The Bible talks about breaking down the enemy’s “strongholds” or fortifications. In plain language, this means that we no longer have to prove ourselves. We are already accepted. We are already embraced. The fear of rejection has, in fact, no basis anymore.
Complete acceptance
God looks at us with complete acceptance and gives us a permanent place in our relationship with Jesus. It is not a critical gaze that breaks us down, but a loving gaze that builds us up. God’s love is a resounding “YES” to your life. It is not a ‘no’ and it is not a “maybe if you try harder.” We are allowed to live instead of wasting away under a yoke of guilt.
That is why renewing your thoughts is so incredibly important. Break those negative patterns. Don’t let your self-esteem be determined by the criticism of others or by that harsh voice inside yourself. Simply realize that you are allowed to be here.
“I say yes to you.”
So dare to be vulnerable. Acceptance begins with God; it is in His nature. He is good and He is not out to judge you. He invites you to adopt His perspective. That is a process, especially if you have thought negatively about yourself for years. But God keeps saying, “I say yes to you.” And He asks you if you dare to say yes to yourself too.
Even when we mess up, He reminds us that the price has already been paid. As Psalm 103 says, “He forgives all our sins.” You can receive that forgiveness with open arms and joy.
Are you struggling today with the question of whether you are allowed to be here? Do you feel like you don’t count? Then know that those thoughts do not come from God. He wants us to go through life with joy and confidence, not with self-hatred. That starts with embracing who you are: your appearance, your character, the way you talk. Everything about you is seen and accepted by Him; after all, He is your creator.
The key is to see yourself as God sees you. From that peace, space is created in your relationships. Because those who reject themselves will often unconsciously reject others as well. But those who accept themselves have love to spare to give others that space too. That is the path God has in mind: a healthy self-image and sincere self-respect.
So let’s do what it says in Luke 9: put your hand to the plow. Don’t look back at old mistakes or past rejection, but look ahead to what lies before you. Change your thoughts, straighten your back, and know that God says a resounding yes to you.
@ Wim van Putten