Can God still speak to you?
Sanctification is a lifelong process of trial and error.
I complimented him
I once had a dream about an acquaintance who was busy renovating a house. Almost everything looked perfect, ready to move in. He was just working on the final details: the floor. I don’t remember if it was laminate or PVC, but it was a difficult job because the subfloor was quite uneven. After a lot of hard work, the floor was finally in place, but in one spot, the floor was still a little wavy. That made sense, because the old floor underneath was completely warped; of course, there was little he could do about that.
I complimented him on the beautiful result, but I couldn’t resist pointing out that one uneven spot, even though I knew there was nothing he could do about it. At that moment, I saw a tear appear in the corner of his eye. Although the cause was clearly due to the old house, my comment felt like a direct attack on his craftsmanship. It hit him right in the heart.
Accepting criticism
Let’s be honest: accepting criticism is difficult. Yet it doesn’t always have to be negative. Look, if you just tear someone down, that’s obviously destructive. But if you give feedback to give that person a boost, it’s worth its weight in gold. When I was still working, before my retirement, I regularly held performance reviews using exactly this approach. On the form, we had to fill in two “areas for growth.” Not everyone was enthusiastic about this, and some conversations were difficult. Incidentally, I sometimes sat on the other side of the table with my director, and those were certainly not pleasant conversations. My work was also critically reviewed, so I know very well how that feels.
Learning to deal with feedback remains a challenge. You think you’re doing fine, but then it turns out that some adjustments are still needed. My manager always said, “Criticism is free advice. Whether it’s positive or negative, it’s what you do with it that matters.”
No vague slogans
This is how the Holy Spirit wants to speak to us. These are not vague slogans, but words that really matter. They are always meant to build us up. Sometimes we need to be pruned. Then He makes it clear that certain habits are simply no longer appropriate for who we are now in Him. God wants us to become more like Jesus; after all, He is our example. We are called to grow in faith, love, and surrender—qualities that Jesus knew through and through.
Romans 8:29 says that God has predestined us to become the image of His Son. In Greek, that word literally means “reflection.” So we must become like Christ. That is quite a calling and, to be honest, quite a challenging task. This does not mean that you suddenly have to start living a very strict or legalistic life. A holy life is not the same as sitting piously in a corner with your Bible. It does mean that you throw off the ballast that prevents you from achieving that goal.
Don’t give up
For me personally, this means that the Holy Spirit regularly holds up a mirror to me. “You could have handled that differently,” or “Why are you worrying about this? There’s no need.” But also: “Take that extra step for the other person, don’t give up. Trust that I will complete My work in him or her.” And even: “Don’t give up when you get yelled at again. I am at work,” says God, “so keep doing your best to help the other person.”
In our lives, there are always places where the sign “Work in progress” hangs. This is not only true for beginners; it is a lifelong process, with the Holy Spirit as our teacher. That can cost tears. Tears of frustration because you fail again or because you fall into the same trap for the umpteenth time. But there is perspective: in the end, you will overcome and win the battle.
That cost him tears
A little more about that tear. It reminds me of Peter. Not immediately of the crowing rooster and his betrayal, but of what happened shortly afterwards: “He went outside and wept bitterly.” Sometimes you cry those bitter tears because you realize that the road to becoming like Jesus is still so incredibly long. But don’t forget that Peter walked that same road for years. From his own experience, he later wrote: “Grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.” Peter fell and stumbled, even in his friendship with Jesus, but he always got back up. Precisely because of that grace. He allowed the Holy Spirit into his life. It cost him tears, but he got there. And that applies to all of us, as long as we give God’s Spirit room to speak in us.
@wimvanputten